It’s all about how you view your problems

I’m reading an interesting book at the moment called, ‘Million Dollar Habits’ by Robert J. Hinger. I picked it up at a second-hand book sale and it is full of really useful bits of information. Chapter three talks about ‘The Perspective Habit’. The author talks about a terrible experience that they went through when they lived in Mexico and his wife was about to give birth to their first child. Almost everything that could have gone wrong did go wrong. He very nearly lost his wife and his child. The author says that it was the most difficult challenge that he has had to face in life and that it changed him forever. From that experience he cultivated the ‘Perspective Habit’ where now everything is viewed on their relative level of importance.  When faced with a challenge, ask yourself, ‘Problem relative to what?’ For the author, every challenge he now faces he compares to his Mexico experience and often it becomes minor or no problem at all.

It’s been a tough week in our household. My husband came off his bicycle at 40km/hour and went over the handlebars. Amazingly, he didn’t break anything. He had some stitches, minor concussion and bad burn type injuries where he had met the road. I don’t know how many times he was told by the doctors that they can’t believe nothing was broken. Fortunate? Yes!

The next thing that happened was our car broke down. Luckily for us we had just collected our Jack Russell’s medication from the vets and had stopped at a local organic store for some lunch. It was then that my husband noticed fluid leaking from the car. Fortunately the specialist car dealer was only 5 minutes away where a split radiator hose was diagnosed. The car was going nowhere (and by this time it was Saturday lunch time). So again, fortunate that we weren’t driving at the time and especially fortunate that we weren’t driving down to Brisbane which was planned for a few days later. Friends rallied around, collecting us, taking us home, taking my husband to his hospital follow up appointment and lending us a car for the next few days. Fortunate? Yes!

After two things going wrong, I began to get really concerned. Things happen in 3’s right? Randall our Jack Russell was scheduled to have a risky operation on the Monday at a specialist vets in Brisbane. Was this a sign that we shouldn’t be going ahead with the surgery ? We’d been deciding whether to go ahead with this surgery for several months and it had been a really hard decision to make because of the risk involved. My mind was working overtime. I sat with it, asked for guidance, meditated on it and my husband and I discussed it and discussed it. At the time I also listened to a Podcast by Melissa Ambrosini talking about her new book, ‘Mastering Your Mean Girl’ where she says that,

‘When you make decisions in life they are either based on fear or love’.

This really made me think. At the same time I also messaged a dear friend who is going through a hard time herself. She has a very big soft spot for Randall. I said I was so scared about Randall and that things happen in three’s. She wrote back saying, ‘No they do not. We’ve had four between us and that is enough’. It was something about her words that really hit home with me. She was right. Who said we had to have three things go wrong? Between us we’d had a lot to deal with and neither of us could cope with a third. Why was I just waiting for the third thing to happen?  

It was time to take control and not be forced into a fearful decision. We decided to go ahead with Randall’s operation. Our friend lent us her car and it actually worked out really well. It was a stinking, humid day and she has a modern car with good, working air-con. We have an older four-wheel drive with pretty poor aircon. Her car was just what we needed on the day to keep us all cool! Fortunate? Yes!

So, there you have it. A traumatic week but every negative had a positive. We’ve seen friends rally around and support us and we’ve been able to look at everything from a different perspective once we re-focused.

So the next time something happens to you, ask yourself the question,

‘So what? What is the worst that can happen?’

Compare it to the worst situation that has happened in your life. The world is not going to come to an end, and if it does we won’t know about it anyway so why worry?

2 thoughts on “It’s all about how you view your problems”

  1. I loved reading your words Melanie, so meaningful and so true,they really made me think of issues I have at the moment in a more tranquil way ,Thankyou x. Xxx

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